SimRacing.org.uk

UKGPL Season 21 65 Novices Trophy
Race 1 Monaco

Welcome to round 1 of a brand new season for the Novices.
Will Norm stop speed shifting and blowing engines?
Will Karliss keep his Australian speed?
Will Fabio win the penalty competition?
Will Vosblod still be in Novices?
All these questions answered, and more.

This is the first time that UKGPL have used Monaco in the Novices and depending on the race, it may be the last.
I would stress to people that Monaco in real life is a tight and twisty circuit where it is often impossible to pass unless the driver in front makes a mistake, and even then it is not always easy.
I would ask all drivers to be patient, to qualify as well as they can and to treat the circuit and their fellow competitors with the respect they deserve.

Please see the Novices registration thread for an explanation of the chassis allocations shown below as the permitted chassis you take here will be your chassis for the season:
https://www.simracing.org.uk/smf/index.php?topic=9196.0

FULL TIME

DRIVER	CHASSIS
Billy NoBrakes	1
Nigel Smith	1
Maddog	3
Il_Lupo	1
HappyAl	1
NHance	2
Norbert	1
Blito	1
Ronnie Peterson	3
RogUK	3
BadBlood	1
Francesco	1
Karliss	1
Cookie	1
DuFossa	2
Economia	1
JonnyO	1

RESERVE

DRIVER	CHASSIS
Maestro	3
Bookie	1
Fragfritz	1
GTA66	1

Reserve drivers should not join the server until there are only 30 minutes of qualifying left so as to give the FULL TIME drivers chance to join, and drivers are not to go out on track until there are 30 minutes of qualifying left as this helps all drivers join the server successfully.

Please restrict chat to pit messages if necessary, and this includes the end of the race, until all running drivers have completed the necessary laps.

The Novice races are run under Int Long rules and all incidents will be moderated.
PLEASE NOTE THE RULE CHANGES FOR THIS SEASON REGARDING SHIFT-Rs
All resets must be followed by a Stop n Go regardless of blame for the incident which caused it.

Race List = IGOR
Server = UKGPL5
IP address = ping myjamesonline.net
Race date = 03/05/2011
Time = 21:00 UK time
Track = Monaco
Variant = 65F1
Damage Model = Int
Qualifying time = 35 minutes
Race length = 26 laps
Password: see above (#post_event_password)

65 Patch: The 2.02 Release of the 65mod can and should be used.
http://bit.ly/d8dECl

Driver lists can be found on the Novice Championship Page (http://www.)

I`m really looking forward to this... I've done some laps in the BT11 on four separate track and improved my PB by 1s/lap or more on each track.. so i`ll be racing the BT11 instead of the planned BRM.....
If I continue to improve like this i`ll have to start practising with the cooper :(

I know I'll miss this first race (drats) but I will be on hand for the next.  I am having an MRI and physician consultation for my lung cancer condition that day.  I hope the radiation and chemotherapy regime won't prevent me from participating in the season.
BookieW :)

Hope you are Ok Bookie _ treatment sounds nasty but I know from personal experience that chemo doesn't necessarily stop you racing. Good luck with it all

All the best and see you at the Glen Bookie.

Yes, I'm sure we all wish you the best possible outcome Bookie.

Just think positive and you'll probably win Monaco as well  ;)

I'll echo the sentiments above and hope to see you back in Novices soon.

I remember those heady days when i used to lap you. ;)

I suspect you remember one of them when I almost took your nose off at Kyalami.  ;D ;D ;D

Hope you get well soon Bookie.

 Get well soon Bookie.

All the best Bookie.

Well - looks like I am back to embarrassing myself. I can't do better than 1:40 here. I am not sure where I am losing the time but Loews and the last hairpin are real problems. I am also having to slow mightily for the chicane - slow slow slow. Not looking forward to this at all. And where the hell do I let people past?

Just keep going flat out at the chicane until you nail it. Once you do that, you'll know what it takes to do it again. Likewise for other corners, try carrying more speed through until you manage to do it without crashing. Unless you keep pushing over the limit you'll never know what's possible. Of course I mean that for practice runs. On race day it's the opposite. :)

I'm certainly crashing a lot  :laugh:

Just drive the normal racing line , let those who want to pass decide where to do so  :)

I'm not sure there is a normal driving line for me  :laugh:

Paul - if you`re online now get yerself to Igor and I`ll try to help .. I`m doing 1:32s here.

"Will Karliss keep his Australian speed?"
i think no, cos cant do under 1:30.8 on empty track, but in race will be traffics
i really hope that Monaco could be the track, that is used in every season.
its to great to through away.
maybe we can switch for the future Sierra Monaco with edited Monacini, witch is more real, and chicane is like in old movies, real chicane, not flatout

Oh dear... 3rd race in a row with hardware problems.... Broadband related again! Tomorrow those nice people at Orange will get a crappy phone call to get it sorted!!!!

2 1/2 hours since my last post, and first of all i want to appologize for that stupid wreck in lap3.
there is no alibi for me (or how to say in english) for that.
i think i was quite fast, but consistance is bad for me. i cant be fast + consistant... so more practice and expieriance needed for me to win a race.
so after loosing my P3, i felt back to P13,
many laps behind slower cars and one disco car, and only thing is i can do is watching pribluda, how leaders run away, not because they are much faster, but because you are stuck between monaco guardriles lol
somehow i climbed during a race up to P5, witch after such training and practising effort seems as worst place and worst race i ever gained.
fighting for P5 wasnt what i dremt about before race and especialy after Qual, where i managed P3
(of corse there are a LUCK FACTOR that i was at all in P5.. cos it could remain P8)
i know there are many PP for me from last year, so if i must do some ban from next race , then ok.
(maybe not from next one, cos it is Watkins "king of GPL rookies")
but yes, referee, you got the point
 :hang:
anyway thanks for race and was real fun,one of my favorite tracks in every sim. There is no street track witch comes close to Monaco!

Well - my first Monaco race - I was dreading it.

After avoiding some of the crashes and making a good start battled my way up to eighth. Then I lost it at the last turn and clipped the center barrier - crash, upside down. Shift-R required - had to wait until everybody was past. <sigh>. No way back. People were lapping me now and I concentrated on being a good citizen. I put in some solid laps and generally I was pleased with how it went. 10th and I might gain a place or two for keeping my nose clean.

LOTS of incidents. Who is modding this one? :(

Pleased with qually. Managed a sub-1:36 which was nearly a 5 sec improvement on my PB. 1:37 was best in the race but I don't think I disgraced myself and unlike Zaandvoort and Castle Combe last year I wasn't too freaked by all the people passing me. Bloody hard though with walls of sound all around to see if someone was coming. Let lots of people past at Casino (Thanks Billy for that tip) and hopefully stayed out of the way mostly. Sorry if I held anyone up.

Nice start to the season. Was surprised how much I enjoyed it.

Results Imported, and for those new to UKGPL, they are provisional until the race results have been moderated.

if you were involved in any incidents during the race, you now need to click on the "Submit an Incident Report" link at the top of the page and describe the time of the incident and what happened.

it may also help if you attach a clip of your replay if the incident involved warp.

 ;D WOW  MONACO  ;D

My third ever race in a 65, and my first race here in Monaco with real people  ::)

Was great fun, but sorry for Martin who was  lost after 17 laps of giving me fire! So I dedicate this win to him who has pushed me all the practice sessions to my borders.
Wasn't easy to learn a car with no really fitting setup. So I made a great effort last afternoon to get it my way.
With a good start I could manage to stay in front the whole race, except the only mistake I made when Martin could pass me.
Thanks to all the drivers who let me pass with no problems!
Never saw so much and strange warping in a race, often it was pure luck not to crash...
I had no technical or connection problems at all.

Thanx
Axel

At least I wasn't the only one warping around then.... BTW check out my fastest race lap - 0.083s!! That has to be a new WR!!
You may all have noticed me connecting and disconnecting at the start of qually. I had a weird problem with the graphics for the bt11 that I had planned to race. The steering wheel gfx had been replaced by a car skin!! A perfect wheel sized "flattened out" modders car skin!!! I've never seen anything like it.. So, as a result I had to revert to using the BRM.

Courtesy of JR Jason....steering wheel fix for the BT11.
Geoff.

http://clarkhillracing.freeforums.org/bt11-wheel-fix-t329.html

Best wishes to Bookie. Well done the podium boys who are all new to novices. Thats enough thank you ;D

This was a nice tight track to debut my BT7 after a voluntary change from BT11. Like most I had a bit of crash & bash but amazingly the car kept going ok. Found it difficult to get a clear run in qually but was happy with the time & also a fair race result. Overall I really enjoyed it. I can't download the replay at present so don't know about penalties. Yes there was a lot of warping with cars disappearing quite often.

Two things to mention:- Firstly well done my mate Clutch on 3rd in the Pro Class. Secondly thanks to Roguk for the gearing set up. Well he didn't exactly give me it. I had a one to one race with him on the server a few nights ago when he beat me easily. I recorded it & the replay showed he was using 1st to 4th much lower than me. I made adjustments to use the gears more or less as he did & the result was half a second off my pb. Its that sort of co-operation that makes UKGPL special. Nice one ;)
Norm H

My race started, a hundred miles from where it finished.  I am in the midst of changing my home base, from London, to the South coast of England. 

So, with race time in mind, and in a fully loaded transporter, I set off through London on a cross-city route, which should've been quicker than motorwaying it.  Except, with half the traveling population in agreement, this was not the case.  Arriving with barely enough time to unload and setup, I was in serious need of some on-line therapy.

Quickly bolting some bits together, I hooked into the land line, crossed my fingers, and fired it all up.  It ran first time!  So jumped onto the track with 20 mins. of practice time to play with.  Noticed fairly quickly, that half my controls, and sound were not working.  Grumble!  So, with just 10 minutes to saunter around the South of France, I somehow managed to find the track again, and entered some much needed open road, to set 4th fastest laptime. :laugh:

Managed to jump to 2nd off the line, from amidst the swathe of new names, and attached myself firmly to Cookies tail.   From the way his car jumped nervously, every time I came close, it was obvious the new connection, was less than ideal.  My only chance to lead, would be a mistake and enough room, to safely make the move.  And after a number of laps it happened - I took the lead approaching The Tabac.  Up ahead, 'Il Lupi' had spun at the Gasworks, and as I rounded the curve, he backed his car across my path, and catapulted my car towards the bay.  I'd lead for all of 10 seconds! >:(

Fabio - 6 months ago you were a good driver.  I hope you are not now a backwards driver!

After a stop and go, I resigned myself to a shadowing role in 2nd.  But fate decreed the warping would become suddenly worse.  After only a distant glimpse of a BRM, we collided, and I quickly bailed out of the cockpit, before more harm could be done.  A disappointing end to an enterprising race.

A very impressive Cookie, and a great first drive from teammate Francesco, to grab a 2nd.  With an apology to any hapless victims, of my surprise visit.  The standard would seem to have been raised for Season 21, and I'll need to do my homework before the next round, to see if I still have the wherewithall to race.  :'(

OK, an update to the connection woes that have befallen me...
A quick call to the orange disconnection team revealed that they have been migrating customers on to the WBC network which is shared with BT and is apparantly over-subscribed already! Also, I found out that my package should have been reduced by £5 per month when they offered to renew the contract but failed to make the arrangements! Oh, and they forgot to mention that the VoIP system from the old package wasnt in the new one either... After 7 months of this I feel totally screwed by them and as a result told them to politely go and f**k themselves. I have cancelled the direct debits to them and have registered the complaint with offcom. All of which is going down on in ink to the head of orange support once i've calmed down enough to make it literate!

Thanks for the BT11 update - what exactly am I supposed to do with it?

I hope Francesco's and Blito's SROU records are going to be erased!  ::)

My comment is very simple: first I don't like Monaco track at all and last, but not least, I think it isn't a good choice to start a racing season, when everybody has a high testosterone level...

OK, I have a few more things to say:

1) in qualify I was ~3 second slower than my pb ???
2) at the green flag I started very carefully to avoid any collisions and I was stripped by Paul :o
3) I was involved in several crashes because of someone else's mistakes
4) at least twice, when carefully managing to get back on track after a spin, I collided wih someone: but it wasn't really possible to see him coming while there should have been waving yellow flags!
5) in the end I got disconnected, and that made angry more than the track itself >:(

Looking forward to the Glen, one of my favourite tracks!

Grats to the winner, the podium and everybody raced.

A special thanks to race organization and to Francesco and Jason for their stunning world records!! ;)

As explained over,is not my record.I don't know from where come this time,i'm not so fast!

Don't worry about the records Francesco, the admin team will sort that out.  Just enjoy the moment, a superb second place and you have put Antipasti Racing at the top of the team championship ahead of Clark Hill and the Wazzas!!!  She will not be pleased but I am :P

I've cleared off Jason's amazing 0.083 second lap (sorry mate ;)) - I can't stop him getting the highlight for fastest lap though, unless Phil knows a way. You'll have to live with that glory as I don't want to keep pestering Giz (he's been pestered rather a lot lately).
Can do the same to clear your record time Francesco but have you any idea of what your qually time actually was? If not we can put in something nominal.

What about the 1:21 qualifying time, Tim?

can u paint my race lap time in blue? just for my plesure :))

A good race from myself, and my best result since season 16.

I'm not getting too carried away as I was just lucky regarding the accidents rather than out right pace from me. I did do a PB in qualifying, so I was quite happy with my grid slot. I expected to have a midfield battle during the race, and was going to concentrate on getting it home in one piece.

I can across the lap 3 accident and managed to thread my way through it more or less without incident. I found myself in a high position, and went about keeping to my plan of staying out of the barriers. Very quickly Jason came up behind me and started to apply pressure, from my point of view he was warping all over the place. I started to concentrate on my lines to defend my position, I made one or two small errors were I would run a little bit wide but not enough for Jason to make a move. Eventually Jason’s warp got a bit worse and we made contact. I’m sure it was a warp contact and I will log it with the mods.

I was lucky (again) that I didn’t need to shift & r and got back on with my race, I lost a place to Jonny O. After a little while Jason was back on my tail, this time there were 2 of him (according to Prib). My pace had picked up a little so he wasn’t all over me, but was still closing in. A weird thing happened at some point because I got shown Blue flags all over the lap. I very nearly pulled over and let Jason through because of the Blue flag, but I realised it was a bug and kept to my lines. It was a bit off putting.

I think Jason got disco’d as he was no longer in my mirrors. I only had about 10 laps to go so settled in to bring it to the finish. I noticed that my fuel was getting a bit low, and when my fuel pressure started to drop with 5 laps to go I started to coast. I was glad to get the flag without any fuel pickup problems.

Overall, a new PB for me. A good finish for me and no mistakes from me. Overall I’m happy with my race. Looking forward to Watkins, where I’ve never been fast but I still enjoy the track.

Congratulations to podium and to Cookie for his first 65 win.

Just want to check if Fran has a 'proper' qually time, if not we can put in something nominal.

Driver: fran5 molteni - Ferrari 

Practice laps
Lap 1: 1m34.046s
Lap 2: 1m21.295s [Off the track]
Lap 3: 6m29.684s [Off the track, Invalid lap]
Lap 4: 1m35.651s [Off the track]
Lap 5: 1m38.145s
Lap 6: 1m34.239s
Lap 7: 1m37.124s
Lap 8: 10m04.086s [Invalid lap]
Lap 9: 1m34.078s
Lap 10: 1m33.383s

PRACTICE TIMES

Pos No Driver                           Team     Nat      Time          Diff     Laps

 1  21  Axel Cookie                     Lotus      GER   1m30.731s          14
 2  12  Karlis Vitols                     Honda     USA   1m31.109s          17
 3   4   Martin 65 Hunt                Cooper    USA   1m31.474s            4
 4   6   J Jonny'O                       Lotus      BRA    1m31.728s           6
 5   5   Jason Blito                     BRM        GBR    1m32.249s           9
 6  22  N Hance65                     Brab BT7  GBR    1m32.430s         12
 7  10  rog uk65                        Cooper     GBR    1m32.677s          13
 8  15  nigel smith65                  Honda      GBR    1m33.035s         11
 9   1  Alastair Baldwin65            Ferrari      GBR    1m33.045s         14
10  14 Billy Nobrakes                  BrabBT11  GBR    1m33.193s         11
11  17 fran5 molteni                   Ferrari      ITA    1m33.383s         10
12  18 Fabio 65 Locarno              Ferrari      ITA    1m35.243s         12
13  11 Paul Whitfield 65               Honda      GBR    1m35.643s          10
14   9 economia economia            BRM         USA   1m36.524s         3
15   8 Martin 65 Hunt                  Cooper     USA   No time   No time    0
16   7 Jason Blito                       BrabBT11  GBR    No time   No time    0
17  19 5 UKGPL.65                       Lotus      GBR    No time   No time    0

I love the look & feel of this classic circuit – just a shame I’m not very good at it.

First a word of welcome to the new entrants to the Novices Trophy, Economia & Jonny O. I notice Jonny is with Team Coyote but his race pace was more like Road Runner.

Qualifying was a good as could be expected but on taking my place on the start grid the rest of the field disappeared. I considered retirement but though I’d take a slow run on lap one & see what happened. The other cars began to reappear going up the hill and were solid enough when I ran into the back of the big lap one accident. (really should have got on the brakes earlier but don’t think I caused any more harm than had already been done). Had a bit of a tangle with Norm in the hairpin owing to a big dose of warp.

Also noticed that the server had dropped me so the blue flags were out every time a car got close. The connection seemed stable enough to drive & I worked out that  all the time Cookie (race leader) was behind me anyone else was on the same lap & OK to race. I hope my connection didn’t cause anyone major problems & it seems that I wasn’t the only one plagued by warp.

LATVIA (LAT)

It's the country in your GPL in-game player profile, Karlis.  ;)

but there is no Latvia... i can choose only Austri flag cos its quite similar to my flag

Go here (http://gplpp.com/) and look under how to/other stuff/your country

I'm not sure we can reflect it in the lm2 import but there's probably something we can do.

PS: now fixed Fran's time, but again can't stop he highlight thing.

Thank you Phil,i hope to gain other results for the team.

After having realized that spectacular time i have given up to other lap ,anyhow i was first.Now i have this time registered in my PC like best practice time but my best time at Monaco in a race is 1,3166 and if i remember also in practice was not far from this time.
The record must be deleted but for the race i have given position,at the start ,to 4 or 5 cars.Is OK for the confermation of my second place?

According to the import your best race lap was 1.32.997 - tbh it really doesn't make any difference as only the fastest lap of the race holds any koudos as far as your driver statistics are concerned.

Yes you should technically have started in 11th but, as Phil pointed out in the registration thread, you are not required to forfeit a position due to timing mistakes.
So yes you are entitled to your 2nd place as it stands.

Would be nice if it could be changed, otherwise I remain Japanese!  ;D

  Please, where is the link to the replay of daownload?

Normally here http://www.jamesonline.net/ukgpl/ (http://www.jamesonline.net/ukgpl/) but Mike's server is out of action atm. Normal service will be resumed shortly.

Thank you Vos,now is all clear.

The server is back for mods to upload new replays, and I will put the Novices Monaco replay up after the Porsche race tonight. The archive is currently missing but I hope to get it back.

That is, if my new host haven't also lost my data.

is there some chances to get my Monaco Fastest Race Lap into my racing history?

Really sorry but, due to the earlier timing issues, I can't get the system to re-recognise the correct fastest qually and lap times. I'm sure it will be the first of many FL's for you...

doh!!! posted in wrong place :D

I just installed it but it didn't fix the problem... :no: :no: :no:
Any hints?

Race Mod Published, padded room ordered.

Thanks everybody for making this hobby so enjoyable.

Any chance I can practise for my next race now?

Great work Mike.  A lot of time and effort has gone into that report :notworthy:

It has but I should also thank Paul who helped me a lot.

It was a pleasure - sort of. Hopefully the Glen will be a little easier to judge.

more fun is to battle in track to get real race position (P5) witch will be dropped after penalty points to (P10)
than
racing confident and slower to get real race position (P10) without penalty points...

:P

That mentality will eventually get you banned from one or more races...

What about the other peoples races that you effect?

ok.
you think i am doing it on purpose?
(that big accdent was my fault 300% and i appologized for that)
but here i talk about such small incidents, touching car etc, small shit witch happens cos you race not to be in P2.
there is no point from racing if you do slower than u can,
racing is risk, and everyone should understand that.
cos otherwise seems, in tracks like monaco i can race slow, cos car behind me will not overtake me, cos there just not room for that, or if car behind me will try to do that
more possible it will hit me, and will be penalized.
or you prefer racing slow and conservative?
everyone in race doing mistakes not because they race for checked flag, but because they doing best they can on limit.
otherwise it is tourism. or you can lottery race positions before race start, then it will be more safest way.

No, of course I don't think you are causing accidents on purpose.

Karlis, there's no such thing as small incidents in GPL. With the way the collision model works and how warp/lag affects contacts between cars, even the smallest touch can lead to a devastating crash. That's why you simply can't afford to race too hard in GPL, it's a sign for lack of respect and you force the others around you to give way just to avoid accident and not because of your superior passing/battle skills. You can have hard but clean fought out races without having to go that far and it's still quite enjoyable.

The point was not whether you cause incidents intentionally or not, but whether you intentionally take too much of a risk or not.

Karliss. You are teriffically quick but you need to understand that driving on the limit does NOT mean pushing to the point where you lose it and take out 3 other people. Driving on the limit is understanding where you can drive fast without going beyond the point of control.

Obviously we will all lose it accidentally sometimes as we all exploring our personal limits. You have managed to pick up a mountain of penalty points though, which suggests that you are driving beyond your limit. If you cut it back a fraction you would almost certainly finish higher because you are cleaner. Look at H. How many times does he crash?

Drive within your limit. You are good enough to win races without affecting other people. If you go hell for leather and keep taking people out, you are going to get race bans. Nobody wants to see that.

Sorry H - posted at the same time. Echo all that.

ok
i agree about respecting other drivers.
seems for me, i just need to work somehow on my metal strenght, but don't see how.
i am confused cos don't understund how is applied difference between
Racing Incident
and
Ambisious Overtake.

im confused now.
ps
anyway i am trying to do my best for clean racing. and what i sad about P5 vs P10, is idea to fight or surrender. Ok, im not so skilled to fight but it is ONLY FOR NOW :)

It's simple really, especially when you race people you know. You just have to avoid placing them in a position where you will both end up crashing into each other unless the other driver eases off and gives you room. Sure, it happens from time to time, but if it happens regularly then it's something you need to address. Sticking to your lines, not cutting in front of people or turning into them, things like that. Use all your awareness and feedback from the sim (FF, sound, visuals) to position your car so you don't endanger others, at least not willingly.

Want to see how it's done? You simply have to watch one of the numerous battles me and Evil have had over the years. You'll see how we race both hard and fair. You can also watch the battle between myself and Clutch from the Snetterton Pro race, although I think he was a bit over-aggressive in his defense.  ;D In any case, watching a replay can really give you an idea when you've crossed the border and when you haven't.

Come to practice races, because people do not race the same as Ai.  We have some crashes, but this is not so bad when you race with friends.  You did this at Adelaide, and so it was a good race for you.  We learn from our mistakes, but not so good when the Moderator is looking at you.

ok
i will try to do some practise race, but its difficult to get time for that. cos i mostly practise in mornings before work, and evenings i mostly spend with girfriend, when she arrives after work (family life)  :)
cos league race is what she respects, but foolin around PC gaming to much in our common time (few hours per day) is not worth

where i can get some replay where is good fair battle?
i had in watkins also fair batle, and i respected Cookies car, when after my mistake i realize, he is much faster. (i didnt head shot moves)

also want to ask question:
in real F1 there is a agreement for one trajectory change per lap, during fight, what about Novice races here?
in watkins i did my best and clienest race ever, and that was a Q, during fight with Cookie in my head.

Replays of recent races here - http://www.jamesonline.net/ukgpl/

The recommended driver behaviour (https://www.ukgpl.com/rec_dvr_beh/rec_driver_beh.htm) is a good place to start for advice.
As regards the difference between a racing incident and penalty situation we base our moderating on the UKGPL rules (https://www.ukgpl.com/index.php/rules/penalties) and review each situation in light of this. Specific rules on blocking/weaving are here (https://www.ukgpl.com/index.php/rules/blocking_weaving).

Does anybody has a fixed FULL65 folder to upload here or somewhere else?
I'm getting mad tyring to solve such issue...
Thx in advance mates!

Hi all, long time no GPL, decided to dust off wheel etc. is this the best place to resurrect my glorious Hiki Waza career?

Cheers

Diki

It absolutely is Paul!!!!! welcome back !! ;D 

SHE will be pleased to see the Ronin return  ;)


psssst. suggest you go to "Announcements" and register which series you want to race in.

Hiki Waza have been fending off the green and red things for the past few seasons but we definitely need some re-inforcements.

I have ordered the pit crew to take off their fundoshis and use them to polish yet another of HER glorious machines in readiness. ( I suggested they do it after dark, so as not to frighten anyone ::) )

If it helps here's a secret clip from a moderators meeting http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yJTROTp8XVA&feature=channel_video_title (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yJTROTp8XVA&feature=channel_video_title).
Now you know how it's all done :)

Welcome back indeed! SHE will be pleased to command you once more!  ;D